It can't be worth it...

Today I discovered one of God's most fascinating creatures...the praying mantis. I have never had strong feelings for them until today, when a good friend of mine pointed out a particular trait I was unaware of previously. Apparently it is a common mating ritual for the female to literally eat the male...whether she does this during or after, I can't be sure. I can't wrap my head around the fact that she straight up eats him. Now THAT is rough sex...but probably not the kind the male imagined when he embarked on this fatal pursuit. Now, I had never heard this before, so I did a bit or research.

I found the above information to be true, but only in 5-31% of the cases. That's better, implying that only 5-31 times out of 100, the female goes psycho and decides to devour her partner. The research article also states that the female is more likely to eat her partner's head when she is under "stressful circumstances". Tell me- how much stress can a praying mantis honestly be under? The final conclusion made in the research article is that cannibalism occurs most often when the female is hungry. Guys, I would strongly recommend making the girl a sandwich before putting on Barry White.

I hope you have learned a valuable life lesson by studying one of God's miraculous creatures. I know I have. If I'm stressed or hungry, it is perfectly okay to resort to cannibalism.

Don't do it!! 

This should be a new ad for abstinence from sex.